So I’ve been off work sick, my Lupus is acting up. I will be off for the next week trying to get my health under control so I can go back to work. So I’ve been trying to tend to the house and get used to my new role as submissive. Its been a little harder than I thought it would be, but I will soon get used to all the changes. I filled out a BDSM Checklist for Sir so he would know a little more about me sexually. I’m getting a little better at calling Sir, Sir and not his name. He’s been very lenient with me on that.
But earlier today I had a strange feeling come across me and I started questioning myself. Can I really do this? Can he do this? Are we really going to be able to do this? Among other things. It only lasted for about an hour but that hour seemed like 5 hours. I had to keep reassuring myself that we both can do this, that we both want to do this. I think the problem with me is I’m a perfectionist, but I know that we will make mistakes along the way and that every D/s relationship is different and that there is no one way to do things.
Last night on TLC I watched a special they were showing entitled “Submissive Wives Guide to Marriage”, it was about women who have chosen to be submissive to their husbands. They really didn’t talk about wither or not they have Kink in their relationships but the concept seems to be a lot like a D/s relationship minus the calling their husband Master or Sir. What kind of shocked me one of the women said “It takes a strong woman to submit, a weak woman would complain and moan about,” it really stuck with me and while I was asking myself all those questions this morning this woman’s voice came in my head and I was like “I am a strong woman, I can do this, I can be a submissive to my husband because I love him and appreciate him so much,” it was that moment that all the unsure feelings just kind of left me.
SUBJECT CHANGE: I don’t know if what I am writing is interesting or not but I’ve seen that I’ve gotten 6 followers which makes me very excited and I want to thank you guys that are following me. I appreciate you more than you know.
